Indeed. I think the way that the dating-apps-soaked youth culture encourages instant hook ups puts the 10% men at an advantage they never had before (earlier generations of girls/women would look at such guys with some suspicion, even if they were getting some tingles). Meanwhile, slower acclimation that would cause a pair of friends to suddenly realize that they've grown towards each other, that would allow the normal guys to be appreciated and pair up, has been memory-holed by the entire current culture.
Feminists denigrate "Disney" romances or fairy tales with the claim they give girls unrealistic expectations about romance being easy and instant. But really, it's the feminists who sell nonsense like there's one right soul mate for each person, or you'll only find love when you're not looking. Cinderella, after an uncomplaining life of household chores, met the prince during a party, but he found her in her workaday life and loved her anyway (the stepsisters conviction that fancy dresses would catch the prince are closer to the form of romance feminists sell). Snow White met the prince by the well, in her work clothes. She did the household chores for the dwarves, and awakened/came back to life thanks to a kiss, later.
The worst lie feminists sell is that you shouldn't rush to settle down. It doesn't take lifelong indoctrination to ruin a woman's chance at happiness. Just get her to ignore biological reality for a key 10 year period (coincidentally, when females are most impressionable to social influence) and her chances of happy family life can be demolished. Then there's a good chance she will be a force for destruction for years to come.
I don't disagree that female selection, influenced by biology, is part of the picture. But another thing that humans have long selected for, if not on the genetic level but on the societal level, is our culture. Sure, women are programmed to try to get the best man, in terms of strength, health and resources, that she can hope to pair up with. But culture used to influence what women and girls would view as possible or likely matches as reasonable to pursue. Also, there were relatives, friends and others who'd act as matchmakers, and encourage taking another look at Tommy over there, he's a good guy and he likes you (I can attest that this kind of suggestion had a lot of power in my view of a boy when I was a teen).
Western cultures fostered mechanisms that encouraged paring up with someone of similar status, intellect and background. We were a culture of married couples, not harems. We didn't have the problem of dating in your 40s, because courtship was something that was part of life briefly, and in youth.
Because of hook-up culture (enabled by dating apps) women have access to brief relationships with the type of men women of earlier eras understood to be out-of-their-league. The captain of the football team and head cheerleader were a trope for a reason. All the girls at school may have fantasized about him, but they didn't have easy access to pursue and contact these guys, the way the 10% get pursued today. Also, because they actually do hook up, girls who are far from top-10% have access to the experience of a fling or 2 or 20 with out-of-their-league guys. This leads the girls to overestimate the kind of guy with whom they'd be a good match. This is what the manosphere calls "alpha widows." (This term had to be coined today because it's such a new phenomenon) After the fling with the quarterback, the 90% of regular guys are even less attractive to her than before.
I also think that this situation is abnormal for the 10% men, who, in earlier eras, would marry a 10% kind of woman, not live a life of endless new hook ups. Back then, "confirmed bachelor" was code for gay man.
The other thing that the women who have their flings with the "captain of the football team" and other high status men fail to appreciate is that selection works both ways. Young women are generally attractive to many men, and thus they can be truly cruel in how they exercise their selections. Come their mid thirties, however, as the biological clock ticks ever louder and their own physical attractiveness falters, their market position reverses. Now the women used to calling the shots suddenly find that their preferred "hot men" aren't interested in them any more AND the "nice" guys they mistreated or ignored for the last 20 years know all about who they are and have absolutely no interest in catering to their demands. In earlier generations and traditional cultures today, these men would have no interest in a "used" spoiled woman of this type. These men have either learned to live without female companionship or seek it from women from traditional cultures who see the value in them that the feminist women felt was beneath them. The feminist women end up unwanted, bitter and resentful of men rather than looking at themselves and how they have reaped the crop they themselves sowed.
Indeed. I think the way that the dating-apps-soaked youth culture encourages instant hook ups puts the 10% men at an advantage they never had before (earlier generations of girls/women would look at such guys with some suspicion, even if they were getting some tingles). Meanwhile, slower acclimation that would cause a pair of friends to suddenly realize that they've grown towards each other, that would allow the normal guys to be appreciated and pair up, has been memory-holed by the entire current culture.
Feminists denigrate "Disney" romances or fairy tales with the claim they give girls unrealistic expectations about romance being easy and instant. But really, it's the feminists who sell nonsense like there's one right soul mate for each person, or you'll only find love when you're not looking. Cinderella, after an uncomplaining life of household chores, met the prince during a party, but he found her in her workaday life and loved her anyway (the stepsisters conviction that fancy dresses would catch the prince are closer to the form of romance feminists sell). Snow White met the prince by the well, in her work clothes. She did the household chores for the dwarves, and awakened/came back to life thanks to a kiss, later.
The worst lie feminists sell is that you shouldn't rush to settle down. It doesn't take lifelong indoctrination to ruin a woman's chance at happiness. Just get her to ignore biological reality for a key 10 year period (coincidentally, when females are most impressionable to social influence) and her chances of happy family life can be demolished. Then there's a good chance she will be a force for destruction for years to come.
Keep in mind that the oppressors of Cinderella and Snow White were not the male characters...but other WOMEN pursuing their own self serving agendas.
I don't disagree that female selection, influenced by biology, is part of the picture. But another thing that humans have long selected for, if not on the genetic level but on the societal level, is our culture. Sure, women are programmed to try to get the best man, in terms of strength, health and resources, that she can hope to pair up with. But culture used to influence what women and girls would view as possible or likely matches as reasonable to pursue. Also, there were relatives, friends and others who'd act as matchmakers, and encourage taking another look at Tommy over there, he's a good guy and he likes you (I can attest that this kind of suggestion had a lot of power in my view of a boy when I was a teen).
Western cultures fostered mechanisms that encouraged paring up with someone of similar status, intellect and background. We were a culture of married couples, not harems. We didn't have the problem of dating in your 40s, because courtship was something that was part of life briefly, and in youth.
Because of hook-up culture (enabled by dating apps) women have access to brief relationships with the type of men women of earlier eras understood to be out-of-their-league. The captain of the football team and head cheerleader were a trope for a reason. All the girls at school may have fantasized about him, but they didn't have easy access to pursue and contact these guys, the way the 10% get pursued today. Also, because they actually do hook up, girls who are far from top-10% have access to the experience of a fling or 2 or 20 with out-of-their-league guys. This leads the girls to overestimate the kind of guy with whom they'd be a good match. This is what the manosphere calls "alpha widows." (This term had to be coined today because it's such a new phenomenon) After the fling with the quarterback, the 90% of regular guys are even less attractive to her than before.
I also think that this situation is abnormal for the 10% men, who, in earlier eras, would marry a 10% kind of woman, not live a life of endless new hook ups. Back then, "confirmed bachelor" was code for gay man.
The other thing that the women who have their flings with the "captain of the football team" and other high status men fail to appreciate is that selection works both ways. Young women are generally attractive to many men, and thus they can be truly cruel in how they exercise their selections. Come their mid thirties, however, as the biological clock ticks ever louder and their own physical attractiveness falters, their market position reverses. Now the women used to calling the shots suddenly find that their preferred "hot men" aren't interested in them any more AND the "nice" guys they mistreated or ignored for the last 20 years know all about who they are and have absolutely no interest in catering to their demands. In earlier generations and traditional cultures today, these men would have no interest in a "used" spoiled woman of this type. These men have either learned to live without female companionship or seek it from women from traditional cultures who see the value in them that the feminist women felt was beneath them. The feminist women end up unwanted, bitter and resentful of men rather than looking at themselves and how they have reaped the crop they themselves sowed.
Another great point.. Worldwide Tindr is certainly a new phenomenon in mating history